How can I respect other feelings

How can I get others to respect me?

Last update: April 05, 2018

You can't get others to respect you unless you have a clear idea of ​​what respect is all about. When we recall certain experiences in which it occurs, it is much easier to understand what that value means. In this sense we respect someone when we recognize them as equals and accept them for who they are.

This means that any behavior aimed at devaluing or disparaging others will lack respect. Just like any action aimed at rejecting, denying, or nullifying another person's feelings or thoughts. It is possible that you disagree with this. But the attempt to change one's own idea of ​​respect is a high wall that has to be overcome.

You can't get others to respect you if you don't respect yourself. This means that you have to perceive yourself as being as valuable as others. In other words, don't feel like you are worth more or less than everyone else. Of course, you should also accept yourself. Feel that you are worthy for being who you are.

"It is more valuable to always have people's respect than to have their admiration occasionally."

Jean Jacques Rousseau

How can I get others to respect me?

The acceptance and appreciation of ourselves are expressed through our attitude and actions. They are not an abstract reality, nor do you have to pronounce them for others to let them know how you are feeling. Someone who respects themselves shows three characteristics: self-esteem, assertiveness, and authenticity.

  • A simple explanation for healthy self-esteem is to have a positive image of yourself. It has nothing to do with narcissism. Instead, it's just about liking yourself. It also refers to feeling sympathy for what you think, say, and do. Without assuming that it would make you better, of course. On the one hand, you should feel as special as only you are. And on the other hand, you should know that everyone else is special too.
  • Assertiveness, in turn, has to do with defending one's rights and being able to express one's opinion. It is especially necessary when you find yourself in an unfavorable situation in which you think differently from the majority of the people around you. Different from the current authority figure. On the other hand this trait is a direct result of healthy self-esteem and an important condition for gaining the respect of others.
  • Further Authenticity refers to our propensity to uphold and be true to our core, values ​​and beliefs. We should do this even if it is not beneficial for us in this situation. This means always expressing what you think and feel regardless of the context. Don't fake or falsify anything just to make a better impression on others. Be spontaneous. Keep in mind that you can only be authentic if you are aware of your worth as a person.

Get the respect of others

Respect begins at home. Therefore, you won't get others to respect you if you don't do it yourself. On the other hand, understand that respect is not the same as fear or awe. Instead, he suggests acceptance and appreciation.

Here are some keys you can use to get others to respect you.

  • Accept that not everyone will like you. You must not depend on the approval or disapproval of others. There will always be people who don't like you.
  • Learn to distinguish kindness from condescension. Politeness is not like submission. We weren't born to make others feel good.
  • Strengthen and practice self-love. Never stop recognizing your values ​​and achievements. Never belittle your accomplishments, no matter how small they seem.
  • Add the no to your dictionary. Setting boundaries does not mean offending or being inconsiderate towards others. It is simply a healthy way of maintaining mutual respect.
  • Accept that you are not responsible for what others feel or think. If she bothers or annoys the way you think, speak, or act, that's not your problem. Let the person be the one to remove their own discomfort.
  • Ask for confirmation when it appears necessary. If you do too much for others, they will eventually stop appreciating it. Stop working together if something like this happens.
  • Learn to defend yourself. Perhaps you are the victim of "learned helplessness". Then it is time to overcome them and learn to defend yourself. It's not easy at first. However, once you've made it a habit, it's not that difficult to persevere.

Getting others to respect you isn't a goal that you can achieve in the short term. Especially if you have disregarded yourself countless times. You have to make decisions and show a strong will to get there. But it's worth it, because lack of respect only leads to unnecessary suffering.

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